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Vurt Michaels
Basic Info Age - 50 Height - 6'0" Weight - 220 pounds Hair Color - Balding/Black Known Facts Vurt Michaels was born to Burt Michaels and an unknown mother (believed to be a goddess, making Vurt a demigod.) Vurt spent his late teens to mid 20's doing little else but lifting weights, smoking weed, and eating chicken. He refrained from entering relationships with women, but has copulated with over 150. Vurt's favorite guitar is his old 1958 Gibson Flying V. When living in Skyrim, the ancient spirit of Evil known as Rafi plagued the landscape, falling to what Vurt believes was his own bare hands, but what some records suggest was a combination of Vurt's physical strength, and the mental strength of his closest friend, Kejaw Sahljaka. Sahljaka claims that the fall of Rafi came from : "98% magic, and 2% of those chicken grease-covered hands". Post-Rafi When the defeat of Rafi came, Vurt spent a week attempting to learn magic from many books Kejaw had lying around, only to call it a waste of time and decided to enlist the help of his friend to send him into the future - to the age of modern man so he could raise his family in comfort, without the threats of war or disease... mostly. Kejaw agreed to grant Vurt's request, on the condition that Vurt release all credit for defeating Rafi, and Kejaw's name be the only one listed in the history books, but Vurt refused. Angered by his belligerent refusal, Kejaw attempted to attack Vurt, but it was no use. By the time the mage could cast one spell, Vurt's hands were around Kejaw's throat, threatening to sever the mage's head and body. The two met on a compromise - if Vurt was sent to the age of modern man, he must never return to Skyrim, and Kejaw even threw in a bonus - making the local pig "Bessie" from a nearby farm that Vurt had been ogling for a number of weeks into a human, which he later married in Michigan. Vurt paid close attention to the words and gestures Kejaw made during the time spell, keeping it firmly planted in his brain as he and his pig-wife made their way into the modern age. A day after marrying his new love and finding a comfortable trailer to live in (which to him felt like a 5 star hotel due to his lack of experience with modern technology), he went to a local library to check some of the old ancient history books, only to find Kejaw had tricked him - Vurt's name was nowhere to be found in the book, and Kejaw had been hailed as the savior of the land. Furious, Vurt took it upon himself to go back into the Michigan forest and perform the time spell on himself, going back to the very day that Kejaw began erasing Vurt's name from the records. Once arrived in his once present time, Vurt sought out the mage who had betrayed him and with two punches, one to the skull and one to the chest, split the liar into 3 separate pieces. Some say the crack from his bones coming apart and snapping echoed throughout the land for all to hear, to remind them who truly held the strength to save them all. But in all actuality, Kejaw's house simply had bad acoustics and allowed for the loud punches to reverberate off the walls for a few moments. Taking Kejaw's books, robes, and shoes with him, Vurt went back to his trailer home in the age of modern technology where he now resides peacefully, father of 3 sons and 1 daughter.